Sometimes You Just Have to Scream

Sometimes there's just nothing else to do but grab a pillow and scream into it as loud as you can.

Or go into the woods where only a squirrel can lay witness to your complete and total lack of control.

Because that's it in a nutshell.

You just can't control everything.

For someone like me, who likes to manage the puppet strings of all life within a 1000-mile radius of my own, the realization is infuriating.

It's not wrong, I think, because I want yo do GOOD. So everyone should be GRATEFUL for my interest.

And, of course, do it my way.

It sounds less absurd in my head as the frustration mounts over things I desperately want to control but can't.

So I'm left with a decision.

Suppress it. Shut people out. Get resentful.

Keep trying to change things, justifying that I know what the Lord wants so it's not necessary to actually turn it over to Him.

Or actually let go and let God take the reins.

And scream into a lot of pillows.